Before we even begin, here’s an offer. If I were to give you a thousand dollars right now, what would you buy? Would you buy a fancy new iPhone? Or maybe a new 4K Curved TV? Did you know that $1000 could get you 30 nights in Thailand in a 5 star hotel? How about that? Or would you be wise and invest them all? Choice is yours. Here’s what I would do. I would buy rubber bands worth a thousand dollars. Crazy, eh? Not when I tell you more about Pablo Escobar.
Thank you for stumbling upon How Big Are They and today, you are gonna be amazed by just how rich, the richest criminal in the history, Pablo Escobar, really was.
So, rubber bands then. Not really crazy, believe me. Not at least if you were Pablo Escobar. At the height of his career, Escobar was spending more than a thousand dollars every week on rubber bands to wrap stacks of cash. You read that right. He bought a Learjet to fly his money. Not cocaine, not himself, not family, he bought a plane to fly cash!
Known as the Robinhood of Medellin and the greatest enemy of the United States, Pablo Escobar, during his time, controlled 80% of all cocaine export from Colombia to US and was involved in thousand of civilian killings among various other criminal activities. Of course, nobody would do this if it didn’t pay well and pay well it did.
How well, you wonder? For starters, Escobar made more than 60 million dollars a day.. in 90s money. If he was earning the same money today, he would be making close to $110 million every single day. To put it in perspective, Robert Downey Jr. makes $80 million a year. Escobar could earn that in a day and then some. Tim Cook? Around $400m a year. Only 4 days of work for Pablo Escobar. Too easy, let’s go big. Bill Gates, on average, makes 30 million dollars a day. Escobar could make that in his sleep. Good thing for all of these billionaires that he was killed in 1993 then.
All was not gold, though, for him. The greater the earnings, the greater the losses. But, hey, we all suffer losses! Part of the job, as some would say. Well, of course, if you call losing $2 billion a year due to rats eating the notes part of the job. Add that to the rubber band expense! Some ways to burn money!
“Father, how much are a billion dollars worth?”, asked the daughter.
“The value of your eyes, my princess.”, said the father.
Speaking of burning money, it turns out that when Pablo Escobar was not being a part time drug dealer, he was being a full time caring father. Legend has that once, while the family was in hiding, his daughter, Manuela, fell ill. Having nothing to generate heat from, he put $2 million worth of cash on fire, to keep his little princess warm. This is, literally, some way to burn money. The father-daughter fairytale didn’t end there though. Manuela once wanted a unicorn. Of course no amount of money could buy a unicorn. So what did he do? He bought her a white horse and stapled (yes, stapled!) a cone to its head and wings to its back. The poor horse died of infection. Not like he cared.
In today’s money, Pablo Escobar would be worth more than $57 billion and would be the fourth richest man in the world. Would it be worth it? He was shot by the Colombian National Police in 1993, leaving his son and much beloved daughter alone at the tender age of 14 and 9 respectively. His family had to escape to Argentina, where they are tortured to this day by the innumerable enemies that Escobar made in his lifetime.
So, would it be worth it? Not for me. More importantly, was this post worth your time? Why not share it with your friends then? If you liked this post, then you will love Narcos (Netflix), TV Series that made me curious about the life of Pablo Escobar!
Thank you for reading and I will catch you in the next one!
Also read: Strip Clubs – How Big Are They?